As children become more mature physically, cognitively, and emotionally, their social relationships with family and peers also mature and change. During middle childhood, peer friendships take on a more prominent role than ever before. Peer relationships can include friends at school, friends in the neighborhood, teammates or other co-participants in activities like Boy or Girl Scouts, and near-age siblings. During this middle developmental period, as communication and cognitive skills continue to improve, children develop increased interpersonal awareness. As a result, they become better at reading and responding to other kids' emotions, and understanding other kids' intentions and needs; why they behave in specific ways at specific times. These social skills lay the foundation for the formation of closer friendships
During middle childhood, kids become
more competent and confident. Parents begin to place trust in the child,
allowing him to take on daily tasks such as selecting his own clothes and
making his own breakfast. Family friendships are still vital, but children are
far less clingy at this age. While
cognitive growth also plays an important role in this progression, a great deal
of social and emotional growth also occurs during middle childhood. As children
start school, their social world becomes much larger. Where most of their
previous social interactions were primarily with family, the introduction of
school opens up a whole new world of relationships with other people. This
offers kids a much richer and deeper pool of social experiences with both
familiar and unfamiliar people.
Friendships become increasingly
important throughout the middle school years. While kids obviously still depend
upon their parents and enjoy spending time with siblings, they also become more
interested in building relationships with other people outside the family unit.
Learning how to make and maintain friendships is an important part of the
developmental process during this time. Few things can make a parent's heart
ache more than to watch your child struggle to find friends or grapple with
social rejection or even bullying behaviors from other kids. Fortunately, there
are things that parents can do to ensure that their child is gaining the social
competence that they need to succeed in school and later in life.
HOW ADULTS CAN ENSURE HEALTHY
RELATIONSHIPS:
Healthy friendships are marked by
cooperation, kindness, trust, and mutual respect. So what should parents do if
their child seems to be in an unhealthy friendship? Remembering that all
friendships have their ups and downs can be helpful. The occasional conflicts
or arguments are not necessarily a sign that the relationship is destructive or
unhealthy. If, however, the friendship becomes a source of stress or anxiety,
then it's time to take action. Parents should start by talking to their child
and encouraging him to share his feelings with the friend. Adults should also
help children understand the importance of walking away from the situation,
especially if the friend is being physically or emotionally hurtful. Finally,
parents and other adults can try to establish some distance between the child
and the friend. For example, a teacher might choose to seat kids who are having
conflicts apart from each other.
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