Wednesday, September 4, 2013

FRIENDSHIP IN MIDDLE CHILDHOOD


As children become more mature physically, cognitively, and emotionally, their social relationships with family and peers also mature and change. During middle childhood, peer friendships take on a more prominent role than ever before. Peer relationships can include friends at school, friends in the neighborhood, teammates or other co-participants in activities like Boy or Girl Scouts, and near-age siblings. During this middle developmental period, as communication and cognitive skills continue to improve, children develop increased interpersonal awareness. As a result, they become better at reading and responding to other kids' emotions, and understanding other kids' intentions and needs; why they behave in specific ways at specific times. These social skills lay the foundation for the formation of closer friendships
During middle childhood, kids become more competent and confident. Parents begin to place trust in the child, allowing him to take on daily tasks such as selecting his own clothes and making his own breakfast. Family friendships are still vital, but children are far less clingy at this age. While cognitive growth also plays an important role in this progression, a great deal of social and emotional growth also occurs during middle childhood. As children start school, their social world becomes much larger. Where most of their previous social interactions were primarily with family, the introduction of school opens up a whole new world of relationships with other people. This offers kids a much richer and deeper pool of social experiences with both familiar and unfamiliar people.
Friendships become increasingly important throughout the middle school years. While kids obviously still depend upon their parents and enjoy spending time with siblings, they also become more interested in building relationships with other people outside the family unit. Learning how to make and maintain friendships is an important part of the developmental process during this time. Few things can make a parent's heart ache more than to watch your child struggle to find friends or grapple with social rejection or even bullying behaviors from other kids. Fortunately, there are things that parents can do to ensure that their child is gaining the social competence that they need to succeed in school and later in life.

HOW ADULTS CAN ENSURE HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS:
Healthy friendships are marked by cooperation, kindness, trust, and mutual respect. So what should parents do if their child seems to be in an unhealthy friendship? Remembering that all friendships have their ups and downs can be helpful. The occasional conflicts or arguments are not necessarily a sign that the relationship is destructive or unhealthy. If, however, the friendship becomes a source of stress or anxiety, then it's time to take action. Parents should start by talking to their child and encouraging him to share his feelings with the friend. Adults should also help children understand the importance of walking away from the situation, especially if the friend is being physically or emotionally hurtful. Finally, parents and other adults can try to establish some distance between the child and the friend. For example, a teacher might choose to seat kids who are having conflicts apart from each other.

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