FRIENDSHIP IN EARLY CHILDHOOD

Human beings are social beings. Responsiveness is built in; we come into the world programmed to respond and relate to others. During early childhood, the main ingredients in forming friendships are opportunity and similarity. To become friends, children need to be available to each other for play and other activities. Children become good friends when they spend a lot of time playing together, sharing toys, and enjoying the same games and activities. Friendships are more likely to form when children are similar in characteristics such as age, gender, race, attitudes, beliefs, or even play styles. Children who are neighbors, relatives, or schoolmates spend more time with each other and therefore have more opportunities to form friendships. The friendships children have with each other are different than those they have with parents and relatives. Family relationships provide an ease, a closeness, a deep sense of intimacy. But they don't substitute for other relationships. Starting young and continuing through adulthood, friendships are among the most important activities of life.

Friendships are important in helping children develop emotionally and socially. They provide a training ground for trying out different ways of relating to others. Through interacting with friends, children learn the give and take of social behavior in general. They learn how to set up rules, how to weigh alternatives and make decisions when faced with tough situations. They understand  negative feelings such as , fear, anger, aggression and rejection. They learn how to win, how to lose, what's right and what's not. They learn about social standing and power - who's in, who's out, how to lead and how to follow, what's fair and what's not. They learn that different people and different situations call for different behaviors and they come to understand the viewpoints of other people. Friends provide companionship and stimulation for each other, and they find out who they are by comparing themselves to other children - who's bigger, faster, who can add better, who can catch better. They learn that they're both similar to and different from others. Through friendships and belonging to a group, children improve their sense of self-esteem. The solace and support of friends help children cope with troubling times and through changing times - moving up to a new school, entering adolescence, dealing with family stresses, facing disappointments.

Friendships are not just a luxury; they are a necessity for healthy psychological development. Research shows that children with friends have a greater sense of well-being, better self-esteem and fewer social problems as adults than individuals without friends. On the other hand, children with friendship problems are more likely than other children to feel lonely, to be victimized by peers, to have problems adjusting to school, and to engage in deviant behaviors.

citations: http://www.aboutourkids.org/articles/do_kids_need_friends

http://www.kidsmatter.edu.au/early-childhood/about-social-development/about-friendships/supporting-children-develop-friendships

http://www.education.com/reference/article/friendships-preschool-childhood-years/